Monday, March 7, 2011

Rob Flashes His Junk, My Crackberry Fails Me.

I had a dream last night that I met Robsten. This should come as no shock, considering my infatuation. However, I have yet to have a Robsten dream...UNTIL NOW!

*Update: I take it back. I have had a Robsten Dream. But, I'm too lazy to search for the post. So let's pretend I haven't...

You know how dreams can be, sometimes they are super clear and other times they're muddled. This one in particular was a bit of both. It started out like this: Lisa & I were in LA (I think) walking down the street sightseeing, when all of a sudden I catch a glimpse of Robsten sitting outside some sort of casual fast food place, sharing a drink.

Kinda like this, but sitting outside.
It might have been a Taco Shop....

Anyway, of course my eagle eyes zero in on them and I start squeeing to Lisa & trying my hardest not to cause a scene. I could barely catch my breath and by the time she realized and then saw what I was saying, she flipped out too. Both of us were practically hyperventilating. We knew it was our chance and we couldn't let it pass us by...Just as we were destined to explore Escala together, we found Robsten together...literally. We proceeded to casually run/walk in their direction. At that point they were getting up and hurriedly walking across the street to what appeared to be a large black tour bus parked in a parking lot. They started to rush even more when they realized the paps had noticed them. Somehow we got to them first and I approached Rob and timidly asked "Can we please have a quick photo, behind this wall... so no one else notices you." I remember smiling slyly to myself as if I was doing him some huge favor by not making a scene. He said "Yah." Lisa rushed over to help take the pic and all of a sudden it wasn't Lisa, it was my Sister, ES. But it still kinda of was know how that goes in dreams. Anyhoo I handed "her" my blackberry & she takes a pic, but we realize it blurred. Rob kindly pulls me in closer and says it's ok to try again. This time he starts giggling in that adorkable British way & proceeds to lift his right leg like a dog about to pee....or a girls gone wild chick flashing her twat. Before I know it he's unzipped his jeans, pulled his undies (don't remember what kind) aside & whipped out his junk for the camera...AND to top it off, thinks it's absolutely hysterical.

He maintains this type of shit-eating grin while Lisa snaps the photo, junk and all.

I in turn am slightly mortified because all I see is dark purplish brown skin and some hair...Basically what you'd expect if a guy haphazardly tried to pull out his junk, not a man gawd showing you his precious, & possibly sparkly, peen. Nonetheless, we pose for the camera and again, it comes out slightly blurry... and even cuts off part of his face.

After that whole experience, I walk around to the other side of the tour bus and see Kristen having a smoke and looking around nervously. I tell her that I'm a huge fan and ask if she wouldn't mind also taking a pic with me. She says "Sure, no prob." Someone (Sarah? Lisa? Sarlisa?) takes our pic and it turns out blurry as well. DAMN YOU CRACKBERRY! Of all times to take shitty pics! She lets me try a few more times and is polite as can be...but the paps are swarming and you can tell she's getting annoyed. Anyways, despite my blurry pics, I thank her and move on.

Then all of a sudden it's Lisa and not some weird combo. Lisa and I are squeeing at how crazy it was that we just experienced all of this & how our bloggy peeps are going to freak. We just keep staring at each other and saying "OH MY GAWD, WE MET ROBSTEN." Then we board a train to somewhere......and the dream is over.

Oh dreams.....



  1. Brilliant! I had a dream the other day involving Rob on set, wearing a strap on pregnancy belly... and junk-in-the-trunk arse. Hilarious. Can't remember it well enough for a blog post though...

    Umm, oh she of the 'no typos please'... you might wanna check your 'there vs their' situation. J/S.

  2. Bahahaha, that's too funny Jen. He whipped it out? PMSL!!

    That'd definitely be my luck too. Not the flashing his junk part, just the blurry picture that cuts off part of his face.

  3. Great dream!! Robsten AND Rob's junk? Me likes it!!

  4. Seriously?!! He whips out his junk and I morph into Sarah? WTF?! LOLOL!

    Seriously though, Jen, I hope this is a premonition instead of a dream and that we DO find Robsten when I'm visiting you in California. Rob doesn't even need to whip out his junk and we'd lose our minds. Well, unless he wants to.

    You and me in Seattle...walking the halls of Escala...will always be a highlight of my life.

    Love you long time!

  5. oh my .. he whipped out his junk?! SarLisa... it just keeps getting funnier.


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