Tuesday, January 19, 2010

JACKSONITIS

Well, since Jen is out of town, I think I will take this opportunity to gear everything towards Jackson for the whole two days she is gone, then I'll let her get back to Rob... and maybe eventually I'll write about something other than Jackson. But for now:

jack-son-i-tis
Jak`son*i"tis\, n. [NL. See jackson, and -itis.] (Med.) [jak-sun-ahy-tis]

A (usually) pleasant illness pertaining to an obsession, however mild or intense, with Jackson Rathbone. Scientifically speaking; inflammation of desire.

SYMPTOMS include, but are not limited to: euphoria, desire, tunnel vision, Robnesia (even if only for a nanosecond), day-dreams that seem to have a good chance of becoming a reality (but only to you), involuntary squealing/groaning, confusion, sudden impared judgment. In rare, obsessive cases-crying, convulsing, development a southern accent and schizophrenic episodes have been noted.

DURATION: Mild cases of jacksonitis usually deal only with desire and minute, very temporary robnesia and can last from five minutes to five years. The most extreme cases usually deal with more symptoms and have a longer duration-months to years. Once infected with jacksonitis, one will always be a carrier.

If you have jacksonitis while within three feet of Jackson Rathbone don't be alarmed that the illness causes stuttering, stammering and staring. You will feel your heart pound in your chest and you will smile dumbly in response to his dazzling, jacksonlicious grin.

WHAT TO DO IF YOU CATCH IT/TREATMENT/CURES: While there is currently no known cure for jacksonitis, there is treatment (for mild-moderate cases)! Firstly, don't panic! You are not alone, and jacksonitis is easy to catch. Support groups (blogs) and internet therapy like youtube videos and 100 Monkeys are usually your best bet. Antibiotics will not help, you just need to go with it: ride the lovely wave of jacksonitis, let it swirl around you and tickle your... .... um... toes. Oh and it is contagious.

Note: If you have the rare, obsessive form of jacksonitis-we don't want you around, you'll ruin it for the rest of us! Go hide in a dark, padded room until you get over it.

Elusive S out!

7 comments:

  1. As I mentioned in an earlier post, I have just recently been diagnosed with Jacksonitis and I caught it here. Thank you for the helpful support group and internet therapy information. Very timely. LOL!

    You seriously need to trademark the term if someone hasn't already. Brilliant!

    Lisa

    ReplyDelete
  2. Well, a blog dedicated to this incurable disease for the next two days or so will surely get my attention!!! LOVE the new Jackson baseball pic on the top right.
    I'm going to wave to Lisa now...^^^^^

    ReplyDelete
  3. @Mrs. P - *waving back* I was waiting for you to call out the the title! Although, maybe Sarah wants us to think of "Jackonitis" while we're coping with our "Jacksonitis." Just sayin'. LOL!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Um...So sista'Sarah..Queen of never having typos, must be at her Jacksonitis worst, and apparently suffering from delirium tremems....Man, that's bad. Thank god we're going to see him in another week, or else she may need to be committed to that padded room she talked so negatively about.

    ReplyDelete
  5. LOL! Jackonitis had so many possibilities, though ;)

    ReplyDelete
  6. mmm padded room... jackson... sar... SUCH a good idea for me.

    ReplyDelete
  7. I don't know where I caught Jacksonitis or when I was infected but it was recent..I think the weekend that Eclipse came out on DVD.... he's yummy.

    ReplyDelete

Say it...OUT LOUD!